It doesn't taste like Turkish delight
by aikakone
Summary: Prompt/challenge response.  Why was Britta in the Turkish section of the Blanket Fort after she said it was too juvenile for her?  Maybe it was about condoms and sex.


**AN**: Written (very quickly) for cherrygurl1225, who gave me a challenge to write a possible explanation why Britta was in the Turkish section of the blanket fort.

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Britta is a woman comfortable with her own sexuality. She makes no apologies for this. She has earned the right to feel fine in her own body. She had to work hard for it, but those issues are not ones she freely shares with the study group. What could she say, really?

"Hi, Annie, remember when you went crazy over pills in high school? Well, I was sexually abused and uncomfortable with my body for a long time. Why do you think I was a squirrel for one Halloween and a t-rex for another?"

Britta would never say that. She would be absolutely mortified to admit it to someone. She certainly couldn't tell Shirley.

"Yes, Shirley, I'm having lots of heathen pre-marital sex so I can get over my own sexual hang-ups. But it doesn't matter anyway because I don't believe in marriage."

She doesn't, either, but that's a different story for a different time.

Then there's Jeff, and she has had sex with him. And when she unwillingly shares the contents of her purse, he's got her condoms and is bringing them to the attention of her study group friends. And she can't complain. Not about the sex, anyway. She doesn't do that any more. As long as she's in control, the sex is good sex. If she ever gave over control, then it would be a problem.

Of course, all this talk about sex doesn't have anything to do with why she was in the Turkish area of Troy and Abed's blanket fort. Of course, it doesn't. That would be absurd. Maybe she was just having normal sex in a bed with a blanket and it suddenly got whisked away to use in the fort. She just fell out of it, that's all.

That's really why she looked so dazed when she saw Troy. Perfectly fine. No need to worry. It's a magical solution. Can't he give over to his inner child just one more time and believe that?

She wasn't even having sex with that guy in the bicycle helmet. She might like to though because of his plastic perfection like some East German model during the Cold War. Perhaps they would have had they not been interrupted by the chase.

His chest was waxed, he said, to make him more aerodynamic when cycling, and it would be easier to lick things off his body. That she would find out herself when no one else was around. Oh, he was a charmer, that one, but all he had to do was look good and not talk. It was so much easier for her when they didn't talk. Who cared about emotional crap, anyway?

She couldn't tell Troy or Abed she was in there doing _things_ with a man in his underoos. Well, he wasn't wearing the real ones, but he might as well have been! But the fact that they had managed to sneak by the Troy and Abed's sentry at the front entrance was exciting.

So her little bad boy biker, but not the kind of biker she usually tried, snuck her in. Everything was great. Britta Perry wasn't thinking at all about the comment from Troy that she should eat fiber and watch The Mentalist. No, she wasn't thinking about that, though if the pretty man had been feeding her raisins, those might have been fiber filled. Maybe.

Do raisins even have fiber? She could ask Jeff. He took a nutrition class, but no! She was not thinking about any of those study group. Just the pretty man with the big pecs in the Turkish section of the blanket city. It was too big to be just a fort now.

What was his name again? Well she didn't remember, so she'd make something up. He looked like a Dieter. That was the perfect East German name for a man with hairless plastic pecs.

But why was she the big deal? It's not like Pierce or Shirley weren't in the blanket fort. Er... city. Well, they were both there, not just her, and they were older.

She finally makes an appearance with the group later acting as if nothing was out of the ordinary. The others never let her get away with that no matter how much she wants them.

"So what brought you here? Messenger boy's bike?" Jeff asks her.

"So what if it did? I'm trying to stay young at heart," Britta answers. "What about you? Why are there holes in your shirt? The perfect Jeff Winger would never have holes in his shirt."

"Annie shot me," he says and gives her one of his very Jeff looks that is usually equivalent to the verbal shrug of "What are you going to do?"

"Even I didn't do that," Britta says as she thinks back to paintball. She also finds that she has a new respect for Annie.

Then Britta notices something peculiar that had not caught her eye until then since she had been concerned with sex and condoms and being found with the guy with the flawless pecs. Pierce and Shirley are wearing the same shirt, yet no one has stopped to ask them anything.

"Uh, guys, do you think there's something you need to tell us?"


End file.
